I Made It My Business. I Don’t Know Why.

After 7 days of consecutive workouts I finally managed to get in a zone with my yogging. This morning I added just a tiny bit of distance, completed 3.4 miles and finished no problem.  Still slow, but steady. If I keep up at this rate I could potentially be doing 5 miles at the end of the month. We’ll see.

It felt good to work out over the long weekend. The temps hit 90 degrees, which put me in a great mood, I got to sleep in, lounge at the pool, and just relax. Saturday afternoon I went for my 3.2 run and felt great after, despite the sticky heat.

Sunday I went to the gym to do legs and Monday I did upper body, mostly shoulders with bis and tris stuck in there. I finished up with a half hour on the elliptical, but not before completely butting into someone else’s business and calling out the World’s Worst Personal Trainer (WWPT).

Seriously, I’ve seen this guy in there before and he completely and utterly SUCKS as a personal trainer. He’s lazy, disinterested, distracted and just generally doesn’t seem to know what’s he’s doing. He’s also fat and grotesquely out of shape and we can get into an argument over whether or not a personal trainer has to “look” like a personal trainer, but let’s just agree that working in that field you SHOULDN’T look like a contestant on the Biggest Loser. Ok?

So I’m doing shoulders and when I go to pick up my dumbbells I see a girl sitting alone on a bench. WWPT is standing a few feet away, chatting with an employee of the gym. The girl is staring off into space. Literally – daydreaming, just sitting there.

While this is a situation that has absolutely nothing to do with me, for some reason I start becoming irritated. 5 minutes pass with no change, and I’m getting beyond annoyed. At the 10 minute mark  (I’ve completed 6 sets plus rest periods) I find myself inexplicably irate. Finally he comes over to her, hands her 35 pound dumbbells for her to bench press and then turns to continue his conversation with someone Not His Client. He turns away while she struggles, says “Too heavy!” and he takes them and points for her to move to another bench. Without speaking to her.

She moves to the other bench and commences more sitting and staring off into space and I completely lose my shit.

From across the gym I say “I hope you’re not paying for that personal training session!” She looks startled and then bursts out laughing. I continue, “I’m totally serious. I’ve seen better one on one attention from online trainers.”

WWPT was pissed! I didn’t care.

Serves him right.

I Miss My Palm Trees

Oh I SO did not want to get up this morning! I went to bed early but was jarred awake at 1:30 and then again at 3:30. When the (first) alarm went off at 5:08 I was really not feeling it. Of course when my second alarm (from the kitchen) went off at 5:22, well, there’s really no choice but to get out of bed, is there?

Mission accomplished.

I stood in the kitchen in my underwear for a bit, rubbing my eyes like I was Cindy Lou Who or some shit. And then I just did. I brushed my teeth, pull my hair into a ponytail, got dressed and went for a run.

I’m so glad I did! Well, duh. I mean who finishes a workout and then says “Damn I wish I hadn’t done that!” Right.

I got some news last night that kind of shook me up. It shook Patrick up too. It sat in my stomach for the rest of the night, until I went to bed, and when I woke up this morning. I’m sad about it for both selfish and non-selfish reasons. And the only one thing I can do is hope that it all works out.

Hope. Seriously, that’s all I got on that one.

Everyone bailed on our Memorial Day cook out and, whatever, less cooking and more pool for me. Actually, tomorrow’s not supposed to be the best weather of the weekend so we’re going to head to Arlington cemetery tomorrow and while Patrick is golfing on Sunday morning I’m going to be a sloth by the pool (after a workout)(and while wearing sunscreen). Sunday evening we’re going to a cookout and all I have to do is bring a dessert. Easy peasy!

I found a great new blog but I can’t read it. I tried to get over it but I can’t, because I am a total and complete asshole. An asshole who can’t deal with jealously or cope with her own reality sometimes. The profile on the blog reads:

I ditched my corporate job in Chicago and moved to San Diego without a job, without a car, without a home, and with very little money. I sought sunshine, adventure, and good running… and that is exactly what I found!

See? I’m an asshole. I can’t read it, it hurts too much.

So Much Better

Well of course after posting about how tired I’ve been, today I feel SO much better! So much better than I have in days, maybe a week. You know what I think it is?

The friggin run jog, that’s what.

It shouldn’t really be surprising. As a former gym rat – spending 3 to 4 hours a day at the gym – it’s no wonder that my body hates it when I don’t workout, whether it’s lifting weights, hitting the elliptical, or going for a jog. When I don’t exercise I feel tired and a little depressed.

Of course there are times when you just can’t  or shouldn’t work out (see again: bladder, needles, icy hot) but the bottom line is, working out = feeling good.

Lesson learned remembered.

I believe it’s jogging or yogging. It might be a soft j.

When I was in high school I used to set the alarm on my dresser, on the other side of the room. This forced me to get out of bed to turn it off. I usually jumped out of bed with my eyes closed, hit snooze, and then snuggled back under the covers for 9 minutes. It was still a better attempt than keeping it on the nightstand.

Last night I set the alarm on my nightstand as I usually do. Then I set the alarm on my phone for 10 minutes later and purposely left it in the kitchen. Now people, that is the way to get your ass out of bed for a morning run!

So it turns out that my running route is actually 3.2 miles and not 3.5. This actually makes more sense, given my ability two weeks ago to run it in 30 minutes despite my general running suckitude. Still, that’s a 5k which means I can say “oh yeah, I can run a 5k” which for some reason pleases me.

Truth be told, I hadn’t been out for a run in over a week. Feeling like dirt was seriously cramping my workout style. I was nervous when I headed out this morning, certain that my endurance would be completely shot. Guess what? It was no problem at all and actually I think I could have pushed it at least another half mile with little effort! You know what my trick was?

I went slooooow.

That was my game plan when I set out. I figured it’s been a while (relatively speaking) since I had run and I didn’t want to stop or walk, I was just going to take it slow.

It worked like a charm! I enjoyed every minute of this run jog! I never worried about how far out I was, how much time had passed, or even the dreaded last incline. I just…jogged. I felt great at the end even though it took me 35 minutes to go 3.2 miles.

I won’t be winning any races, obviously, but I think I just found my stride.

More Forward Motion

I’m pleased to report that I successfully added the additional half mile to my run this morning, and I completed 3.5 miles in 30 minutes. To be fair, I don’t have any fancy GPS running gear – I mapped the route using google maps and logged my time using my watch. So, grain of salt and all but pretty damn close.

I felt good! Well, I felt good when I was done. My legs started getting tired somewhere around two and a half miles and in the last quarter of a mile – the incline – I solidified my decision to stay at 3.5 miles for at least a week. I’ll try for 4 miles before the end of the month but I’m not ready just yet.

Outdoor running definitely uses more of your entire body than jumping on the treadmill.

And don’t think I haven’t been trying on my skinny jeans after every run like, “Hey thighs! We ran today! Are you skinny yet? WTF?!” This evening I’m in the gym for shoulders and abs and I’m already wondering if or how sore abs will affect my run tomorrow morning.

Aside from my own personal triumphs, one of my most favorite people on my planet – someone that I love to my core – is going through a personal heartache that I can’t imagine. I feel helpless and sad and am mentally prepared to get a call at any moment that will put me on a plane to be there. I hope it doesn’t come to that for a while.

Prayers and good thoughts are appreciated for her.

I Guess I Should Make Some Birthday Goals

I changed my route this morning and it was SUCH a good move! As soon as I hit the half mile point I knew that there was no way I wanted to get to the half way mark (the “turn”), see my apartment in front of me and then turn around for another lap. The down and back, down and back thing was just sucking. So when I hit the main road I just kept going. I figured I’d run along the main road to the one and a half mile point as long as there was a sidewalk.

It was such a good call. When I hit the 1.5 mile marker I turned and headed back. Even though I still had a mile and a half to go, I was already in the home stretch! Final lap!

Mind games are fun.

So, yes, I’m still only cranking out 3 miles but I still have my sights set on a longer route. Tomorrow I’m going to do 3.5 and make that my new minimum, and then I can work on tackling 4 miles next week.

Baby steps.

So here’s a nice DUH moment for you that I had this morning: workout clothes are NOT running clothes. Birthday gift certificates to Dick’s will be happily accepted. Thanks.

Oh right – my birthday is in 12 days. I’m feeling all analyze-y about it. 34 sounds a lot older than 33 for some reason. Like, 40 is just right there. For the most part I don’t really care – I’m healthier than I’ve ever been (emotionally and physically), I’m more comfortable with myself than I’ve ever been. My skin is holding up nicely (thanks, SPF 55 and Sicilian roots!) and I still don’t have a gray hair on my head (although I did find one graying hair a couple months ago. From the root to two inches down was gray, the rest of the hair was brown. I’m not counting it.)

It’s just that, there’s still….STUFF that I need to get done and I feel like time is running out. It’s not, I don’t think. But still.

Age. Looming.

Still Moving

Aaahhh Friday! I do love me some weekends! This weekend is going to be a little cooler than we’ve had the past few days but that might work out in my favor as I’m going to try to get in a slightly longer run.

I’ve only put in two runs this week – the same 3 mile trek – and I feel pretty good about it. I’m definitely struggling at the end when I hit that tiny incline and my legs are tired and I’m winded and I think “what the fuck am I doing this for?” But for the most part I still feel like I could do a little bit more (she says from the comfort of her chair). Overall it just feels good to be outside and the fact is that you are all right: running outside isn’t the same beast as running on the treadmill!

So tomorrow I am trying something new: I’m going to drive up the road and park my car near the running trail. I’ve already mapped out 2 miles which will allow me to run the 2 miles down, turn, and hit a 4 mile run by the time I get back. Even though it’s longer overall, I don’t think it will seem that way since there’s only one leg down and back. That’s my theory at least. We’ll see how that goes.

I’m feeling pretty good about my current workouts. I’m still only lifting three times a week doing a heavy leg day, a strong shoulder day, and a light upper body-ish day.  Wednesday at the gym Patrick asked me what I was working on and I told him: just a few random upper body stuff, some abs.

He replied with a smile, “Ahhh. A girly workout.”

He conceded after I broke it down for him:

100 pushups
100 decline sit ups
100 crunches/leg lift combo
3 sets cable crossovers
3 sets bicep curls
3 sets skullcrushers
20 min on the elliptical

It’s not a workout that’ll get you on the NPC stage, but it’s working for me.

You Have To Start Somewhere

You know what I didn’t do last week? I didn’t go on the group fun run. I was all set to go -changed into running clothes, had already scoped out the location so I knew where to park. I had been looking forward to it! And then.

Well, and then a few things. One is that the nasty rash on my body has been really unhappy with tight, sweaty sports bras. (We now think that it’s an allergic reaction to new detergent that I bought and Patrick spent all evening re-washing most of my wardrobe. )

The next thing was that the location is a couple of blocks from work, but didn’t start until an hour and a half AFTER I leave for the day. While I could have sat at my desk for an additional hour and a half…well, I’m not even going to bother finishing that sentence. I also could have just hung out in my car (which I do quite often! And enjoy!) but 90 minutes is a lot even for me to endure.

But the REAL reason is this: I was just chicken shit. I pussed out. I suck. Booooo. Fail.

I was scared of sucking fantastically so I went home and felt like a loser and decided that I was just going to have to conquer this “becoming a runner” thing on my own.

Yesterday I mapped the distance from our complex to the major road at the end of the street to be .75 miles. And, not that you can’t, ya know, ADD, that means that if I ran to the light and back twice I could get in 3 miles.

Three teensy miles. When I get on the treadmill I make four my absolute minimum and three miles just sounds pretty lame. But, then again, I hate getting on the treadmill and the whole point of all this is to find my mother-fucking RUNNING ZEN ALRIGHT?1!! It seemed like a reasonable enough start and, truthfully, I didn’t even know if I’d make it that far.

I went to bed early last night so I’d have no excuse for not getting up at 5 and going for a run. OUTSIDE.

After only one hit of snooze this morning I got up, got sufficiently ready and dressed and made my way outside. Into the pouring rain.

So I thought about it. It’s raining. Good excuse to go back to bed! Or, ya know, hit the treadmill that’s right there.

Or, just suck it up and get a little wet. Which is exactly what I did.

I hit the sidewalk with a run (read: slow jog), down to milestone 1 (.5 miles), up to milestone 2 (the main road). The rush hour traffic was loud and unpleasant and at only a quarter of the way there I was already might wet. I also tried to recall if that road has always been so far uphill, or if some asshole came last night and lifted the road. I made it to the light, did my turn and headed back to my parking lot – the half way point.

Seeing the entrance to my warm, dry, apartment was definitely a lure, but I couldn’t look myself in the face and call one and a half miles a workout, so I turned again and headed back to the main road.

The last stretch back was easy, being mostly downhill and all, and it was only a few blocks out before I landed ankle deep in a puddle and noticed my shoe was untied. When I walked in the door I was utterly saturated, but not terribly winded. Three miles was, admittedly, not all that hard. I’m not sure yet how to add some mileage while avoiding a major freeway but there are a couple of neighborhoods I could probably detour into to add a little distance.

I’ll probably stick with the three miles for the rest of this week until I really feel like I’ve got the hang of it. And while it’s not much to brag about, still, you have to start somewhere.

I Guess The Answer Is This

So remember how I wanted to learn to be a runner? Well two days after I published that post our office had a “health and wellness” fair. Basically, a bunch of local gyms, masseuses, chiropractors, and others came and set up tables downstairs to collect our info to add to their database. I visited most of them but didn’t offer my contact information.

That is, until I saw the Running 101 class. Yes! There’s a running store up the street from the office that measures your gait, sells shoes and such, but also offers classes and training for “learning” to run. They also have free “fun runs” twice a week! I’m starting next week with the Ladies’ Night fun run and hope that someone else will be as slow as me so I have someone to talk to.