Archive for October, 2008

Oh No I Di’in’t!

OH YES I DID!!!

(click on each to make bigger)

Mama, I so not impressed. I get treat now?

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It’s Not Her Fault

Sooooo Kima kinda gave me a swollen, split eye last night. It’s better today, although it hurts like hell and is kinda bruised.

We were playing because YOU ARE SO CLEAN YES YOU ARE WHO’S A CLEAN GIRL and she was very excited. I usually play rough with her anyway, but I’m also usually a little more cognizant of her being WAY FUCKING MORE POWERFUL THAN ME.

So she was laying there on the couch and I crawled up next to her and wrapped myself around her. No big deal, pretty standard evening for us (god my life is lame.) Then I start playing the “chase my hand” game, where I scratch the couch with one hand, she goes for it, then I use the other hand and she turns directions and goes for that one. Then I try faking her out, going back and forth so she doesn’t know which hand to attack.

You see where this is going yet? Normally I do this sitting up and away from her. Last night I was laying directly beside her, one hand above her head, the other down by her butt. As she was mouthing the hand above her head I started taunting her with the hand by her butt and she hurled her body into a 180 degree spin to get it.

Somewhere in the middle there she head-butted me. Hard. Really fucking hard. Hard enough that I blacked out for a few seconds, got my bearings and then realized my eye was quickly shutting on its own. And bleeding.

Oops.

I so sorry Mama. You still yub me???

Puppy Spa

My big plans for the evening? Giving the dog a bath.

Don’t be jealous.

Edit: WHO IS SO CLEAN? WHO’S A CLEAN GIRL?!? YOU ARE! YOU ARE THE CLEAN GIRL!! YOU ARE SO CLEAN YES YOU ARE!!

Cellphone Popcorn

And the saddest part about this video is that I don’t have enough friends here to actually try this.

This Is How Boring My Life Is

But at least my friends’ lives are equally lame and they are funny…

Me: HOW COULD YOU NOT EAT MEXICAN IN SAN DIEGO?? I’m sure the Mexican in SB is delicious, but still. When in North Tijuana you must eat Mexican. It’s just a rule. I would kill someone for a good burrito right now.
East coast = shitty Mexican food. The Chinese food is better out here, though.

Her: I concur – east coast Mexican food is so awful, it is beyond words. Mexico should probably declare war against the entire eastern seaboard based on their bastardization of their cuisine.
And the Chinese food is SUPERIOR !!! Definitely.

P.S. Seriously. Los Ponchos. Santanas. I covet it.

Screams

Last night a guy charged at me with a chainsaw. I choked on the exhaust but I managed to make it through with just a little whining, and crawling across the lap of the person sitting on my left.

Then I was attacked by six clowns in a round room with three doors but only one exit. This was not fun, but I put my arms over my head, ran in circles, and made my way out.

On the final stretch through the woods I lost hold of the hand I was gripping and turned around to recover it only to find myself nose to nose with a zombie.

That’s when I finally let out a full throttle scream.

Chocolate Flaxseed Brownies / Cookies

I created these today in the hopes that they would curb my craving for brownies. I thought they would have a nasty, chalky consistency and not much flavor but they surprised me! Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t take these to a dinner party or anything, but they are actually pretty good. I baked mine in an 8×8 pan, but I think you could dollop them on a cookie sheet and make chocolate cookies since the mouthfeel is more similar to a cookie than a brownie.

I was going to use oat flour instead of regular flour to make them even healthier but decided that 1/2 cup spread over 9 servings was worth tolerating in order to get a better product. I’m pretty sure these would be really rubbery if they were made with oat flour.

Chocolate Flaxseed Brownie / Cookies

2 squares unsweetened baking chocolate
1 1/8 cups flaxseed meal
1 cup Splenda granular
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
4 1/2 Tablespoons egg white
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup flour
1/4 – 1/2 cup water, as needed

Preheat oven to 350. In a glass mixing bowl melt the chocolate in the microwave for 2 minutes. Remove from microwave and stir until completely melted. Add the Splenda until mixed. Add the egg whites, flaxseed meal, baking powder, vanilla and flour. Mixture will be quite pasty and dry. Add water until all ingredients are combined (will still be quite thick, more like a cookie dough).

Bake in 8×8 pan (you’ll have to use your fingers to spread the mixture out) or drop by spoonfuls on a baking sheet. Bake for 20 minutes. Let cool completely before eating (will taste funny warm.)

Makes 9 servings, each:

131 calories
8 g fat
14 g carb
5 g fiber
5 g protein


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AMYELLA

Amyella (pronounced Amy-ella) is a pseudonym for Amy Levitt, a fitness and health food fanatic and a beach girl at heart. She has been sharing her sometimes nonsensical thoughts and self-amusing stories online since 2002 and currently spends a good deal of her time wrangling her 90 pound Rottweiler and 60 pound Boxer. Which is quite a show.
The origin of the name Amyella.

Here's my deal. It's wicked exciting!

RECIPES

Find the recipes here: Amyella's Recipes
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