Facebook: Making My Family Relationships Even Weirder, Since 2009

I haven’t exactly had a close relationship with my mom since…well, since I was about 8. It’s certainly not worth getting into the lengthy explanation or stories or emotional dysfunction that’s ensued for the past 25 years or so, but let’s just say that I went years without having a conversation with my mom, haven’t seen her for a holiday celebration in over a decade, and although we recently both make some efforts to sort of keep in touch (-ish) most of our conversations revolve around things like the weather and my dogs.

I recently saw my mom in person for the first time six or seven years. It was, as you would imagine, awkward at first. But also, not awkward in a way that I can’t exactly describe. Behold my literary brilliance!!

Since then we’ve both made better attempts with keeping up quasi-regular emails. Also, I sent her a Christmas card. I know, right?

Yesterday she emailed me and asked if I’m “on facebook” and have I seen “[my sister] on facebook” (my sister and I have been Facebook friends since she signed up) and let me know that she’s “on facebook” and I can find her “on [my sister’s] facebook”. She, it seems, recently learned of and signed up on Facebook! I replied to tell her that I can’t access the site from work but will look her up later and send a friend request.

And I did.

Obviously I spent the next 30 minutes engrossed in Facebook stalking her. Yes, Facebook stalking my mom. She only has a couple of status updates and nine friends (mostly family) but it appears she only signed up within the last couple of days. Her profile info lists my sister and me as her children, her birth date (minus the year, of course) and offers a brief statement to let people know that she is witty (literally. She wrote, “I’m witty!”) Complete with two emoticons! She also has a photo album posted.

It seems my mum is fairly computer savvy! Who knew?

(Probably everyone who actually knows her.)

Her pictures show her cross country skiing in the backyard that I grew up in and sitting around her dining room table for Thanksgiving dinner with her gentleman friend and his three kids.

It seems that she is quite well and overall happy, and that’s a nice change from the woman that I once knew. I’m actually looking forward to following her on Facebook and keeping in touch and the truth is that I long, long ago gave up on any feelings of animosity towards her. And the older I get the more I feel like it would be nice to have a relationship – any positive kind – with my mother.

It is weird, though, to “meet” your mom through Facebook status updates.


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Amyella (pronounced Amy-ella) is a pseudonym for Amy Levitt, a fitness and health food fanatic and a beach girl at heart. She has been sharing her sometimes nonsensical thoughts and self-amusing stories online since 2002 and currently spends a good deal of her time wrangling her 90 pound Rottweiler and 60 pound Boxer. Which is quite a show.
The origin of the name Amyella.

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