I yike da sun
Why it move?
THE HELL?? STOP. MOVING.
Meh. I good.
In the past two nights my dreams have been cluttered with all sorts of non-sensical bullshit. There is no particular order or thread of a storyline to tie these all together, so let me just rattle a few snippets off for you.
(Sorry, not much else going on in my life. This is all I got.)
So, in my dreams: a dog funeral, a Seahawks beanie, a can of paint also emblazoned with the Seahawks logo, the peg board from Julia Child’s kitchen, a necessary plate in my mouth to keep my shattered jaw in place, random high school acquaintances, Josh (one of my best friend’s at age 13), and bleachy-fried hair.
I think it’s safe to say that my brain hates me. Getting out of bed this morning was a bitch.
The good news is that it’s Tuesday so there are only 3 more days until the weekend! It’s also Lottery night which means there’s an excellent chance that we will be millionaires by tomorrow.
Other unexciting goings on: I miss being able to get quasi regular manicures and pedicures. Being broke sucks balls. Surprisingly, I don’t miss regular eye brown waxes because I’ve found I do a better job on my own. Cheers to that!
I’ve been thinking a lot the last few days about the changes in my life over the past year, no doubt because HP and I just celebrated our one year anniversary. Maybe I’ll write more on that later. Still feeling unsettled about being in Virginia another year but am soothing that with compulsive Craigslist house hunting.
And finally, a recipe for you! Don’t be put off by the name, giambotta, it’s just a really delicious vegetable dish.
After a fantastic but utterly exhausting weekend of entertaining HP’s aunt and uncle I do believe that zombies have eaten my face off and inhabiting my body. When the alarm went off this morning I definitely considered throwing it into the wall. I have not even considered working out today.
To be fair, doing the touristy thing is only partly to blame for my half closed eyes because I also took two Benedryl at 8:00 last night. Why Benedryl? Oh, well that would be because I’m covered from neck to knees in some sort of hideous rash. Don’t be jealous! I have no idea what these lesions are – they sort of look like hives, but they don’t really itch. I dunno. I am wicked secksi.
If I manage to get caught up on sleep tonight I will make an attempt to get in my run tomorrow and lifting tomorrow night. I plan to work from home on Wednesday, which will give me a good chance to get to the gym. I’m still looking forward to Thursday night’s “fun run” – it’s a Ladies Only run that’s about 5o minutes. I am dying to see just how fucked I am!
Have I posted my recipe for Giambotta yet? I’ll check over at my recipe blog but I don’t think I have. It’s my new favorite lunch with the taste of Nana’s kitchen but the health of mine. I have to admit, though, that I do use the white potato. It’s too authentic to change. If you’re a real hardcore stickler for omitting the white starches you could use a sweet potato. It wouldn’t taste the same but it would certainly be yummy anyway. If you do that, though, don’t be surprised if a branch lands on your car or something.
So remember how I wanted to learn to be a runner? Well two days after I published that post our office had a “health and wellness” fair. Basically, a bunch of local gyms, masseuses, chiropractors, and others came and set up tables downstairs to collect our info to add to their database. I visited most of them but didn’t offer my contact information.
That is, until I saw the Running 101 class. Yes! There’s a running store up the street from the office that measures your gait, sells shoes and such, but also offers classes and training for “learning” to run. They also have free “fun runs” twice a week! I’m starting next week with the Ladies’ Night fun run and hope that someone else will be as slow as me so I have someone to talk to.
First, Kima is doing just fine. I worked from home the day she was sick and by 2pm she was pulling me towards the dog park on her afternoon walk. She probably got some nastiness on her face during her morning walk (where she spends more time with her head in the bushes and grass than actually walking and pooping) and then licked her nose. Or something. I don’t know, every time I asked her she wouldn’t tell me. And I asked her a lot, believe me.
On to more important topics, namely, my tv viewing habits.
So, I admit that I watch a fair amount of horrible television. I can’t help but get pulled into the Real Housewives of Orange County and lately I pause when I hit 16 and Pregnant on Mtv. That’s pretty much shitty TV at its train-wreckiest. But I am totally not ashamed to admit that I could watch hour after consecutive hour of Intervention and Addicted. It’s riveting. I don’t know if it’s because of my past ED or what, but these shows get me every time. Every. Time.
No matter how screwed up the addict is, or what kind of shitball they are, I always root for the them. I’m constantly yelling at the “enablers”, but then empathizing with them and chanting “say yes to treatment, say yes you’ll go!” And when they go all I care about is seeing that black screen with the white lettering giving me an update. DID THEY STAY SOBER?!
I don’t know what makes me tear up more: when they succeed or when they fail. When I see the episodes where they’re all “Jane relapsed twice after leaving treatment but has been sober since October 2007” I’m all YEAH JANE! And I get teary with joy for her success. And when I see “Joe left treatment after 3 weeks and has been using daily and living in the streets” I get teary with sadness. WHY JOE? You have access to free treatment! Get help! YOU CAN DO IT BUDDY.
The one that got us both – HP, too – was the 30 something alcoholic that was crumbling to pieces despite his loving, supportive, and patient family. He seemed eager to accept the opportunity for treatment. He went, he stayed for the duration. Man I was pulling for him.
SUCCESS!! Oh my god what a relief. I seriously was watching this entire episode with anxiety pains. I wanted Chris to make it. Thank goodness. HP and I were tired, but felt good knowing we could head to bed thankful that Chris had made it. It’s just a good feeling, a hopeful feeling.
WTF!1!!!??? OMG THE TEARS. The disbelief! The shock in the pit of my belly!!
Huh – it’s weird that I don’t sleep well, dontcha think?
Do you watch these shows? Don’t you want them to succeed?
Even though I don’t write about it that much I’m still as obsessed about what I eat and my energy output as I always was. There are a couple differences, though:
-I used to care only so that I would look good. These days I also care about being healthy. I know, right? Weird.
-I used to be willing to sacrifice other things (social life, time at home, money, sanity) to achieve a physique goal. Now I like having a better, more sane (and sustainable) balance. I still make some sacrifices, but not to the same outrageous degree.
I don’t manically count calories anymore or train three hours every day. For example, typical meals look like this:
Breakfast: oats & egg whites OR sprouted bread with raw almond butter
Lunch: Salad with hummus OR Quinoa and vegetables
Snacks: a piece of fruit OR cut up veggies OR oats with ANPB and honey
Dinner: Salad with Salmon and couscous OR Grilled chicken and veggies with a slice of sprouted bread OR “pizza” of wheat crust with sauce and tons of veggies (no cheese).
I splurge more than I should – at least 2 dinners a week. But overall, I eat healthy foods in reasonable portions.
I make dinner my largest meal because it’s easy for me to eat light during the day, but when I get home I’m hungry regardless of how much I had for lunch.
Also, the greatest thing ever about not “fearing the fat”: extra virgin olive oil. I use it to dress my salads or put a teaspoon over my veggies. Yum!
In my workouts I’ve cut back lifting a lot. I do strength training about 3 times a week, alternating upper body and lower body. I always lift legs as heavy as I can (which, by the way, is NOT very heavy these days!), but for upper body I keep it lighter. I mean, really, I’d like to fit into my tops again someday. If you would like some lats and triceps, I’ll gladly share. I still work shoulders because I just really love doing shoulders but I rarely do a real chest or back workout. For example, last Saturday I did 100 pushups, 100 decline sit-ups and 3 sets of cable crossovers, then did an hour on the step mill and called it a day. That certainly isn’t a bodybuilding “workout” but I’m never stepping on stage again so I’m not too worried about it.
But what I really need help with is running. I do 5-6 cardio sessions a week but I really hate it. Depending on when I’m doing it I’ll either hit the stepmill for an hour or jog 4 miles on the treadmill. Why 4 miles? Because it’s all I can do without wanting to punch myself in the face. I know running is tough on the body, but some people just love it. If I could love it, I wouldn’t look at it as my “dreaded cardio session”. I could burn some calories while in my zen.
So tell me, runners, how do you love it? Can I force myself to enjoy it? How do I get up to 5 or 6 miles a day, lovingly melting those calories away?